Story
My Story
When my husband proposed the idea of starting a family, I was knee deep in my first startup. I had few role models of female entrepreneurs with kids. All I knew were the statistics about women taking steps back in their career once they had children.
“Someone is going to have to carry the mental burden of packing school lunches and planning for field trips. That’s most likely going to be me!”
I didn’t want to be the parent who had to take on all of the tasks by default. I wanted to have time for my own life and share the responsibilities. I learned about the idea of a ‘lead parent’ from Anne-Marie Slaughter’s husband who wrote the article Why I Put My Wife’s Career First. I told my husband that we could have kids if he would be the lead parent.
He balked at the idea. “Why can’t we be ‘co-lead parents?” he said. I wondered the same.
I began having conversations with other couples and quickly learned we were not alone in this predicament. Many couples wanted to level the playing field at home -- they just didn’t know how. This realization inspired me to start Partnerhood.
Other Stories
I interviewed hundreds of women and men to further my understanding on how they shared household responsibilities. I learned that while a few couples were working really hard to create an equal partnership, many were dissatisfied with the balance at home but didn’t know how to make a change. Here are a few insights women shared with me:
“I’m the CEO of my house, but it’s a job that I never applied for.”
“I have 45 tabs open in my head. My husband only has 5.”
“I don't want to be the reminder-in-chief!”
Even for couples who share household tasks equally, it is the invisible labor that usually falls on women. Women assume the role of “house manager”, not by choice but by default. So, how did we get here?
Society’s Story
The women’s rights movement of the 70’s paved the way for a level playing field in the workplace, but it fell short in addressing equality in the home.
The cultural norms surrounding household work and childcare are still deeply ingrained in society. We’re influenced by the dynamics of our childhood homes, the media, and the picture-perfect displays of utopian families on Instagram (let’s be real, life is much messier than this!).
Our Vision
We envision a world that holds the same expectations regarding childcare and household responsibilities for men as it does for women. We believe the best way to create this societal shift is by showing our kids a better model. When children see their parents working together as a team to care for their family, they’ll assume that is the norm.
Partnerhood gives couples the tools to be that model -- be that change. By finding balance in the home, everyone wins.
Our Mission
Partnerhood wants to change this dynamic by providing couples with actionable strategies to operate as a true partnership. We recognize that every partnership is different. It’s not about a 50/50 split or keeping score. There is certainly no playbook that will work for everyone. We want to help couples reimagine the home as a team.
Our mission is to create more balance in the home by giving couples the tools to build a flourishing, well-aligned, and happy partnership.
We hope you’ll join us!
— Maya Tobias, Founder
Share Your Story
Do you have a story about how you and your partner got closer by conquering tasks together? We’d love to hear from you!